When you have a wedding with two or more cultures, it can be difficult to please both parties. Especially when the cultures have contradicting traditions. You just have to remember that your wedding day is for you and your partner, no one else. Do what makes you happy. See it as an opportunity to make it a unique, bespoke occasion that you will remember with joy.
We can deal with all the tricky stuff.
Incorporate both Cultures
This will make sure that the traditions that are important to you and your partner are included in the wedding. This is also a great way for you to learn about each other's cultures. It can be difficult if you and your partner have traditions that contradict each other. But you have to compromise on things that are less important to you and are more important to your partner.
Educate Yourself and Family
Weddings are a beautiful way of showcasing your culture to your partner's family and vice versa. They are also a great way to learn about the cultures, every culture has beautiful traditions and sentimental practices that will broaden your way of thinking. It is important that everyone respects each other's traditions and understands why they are happening. So make sure you and your partner understand the significance, so you can educate your families.
Role of Culture to you and your Partner
When talking about the importance of your culture's traditions, a key part of the conversation needs to be about the role of culture in your and your partner's life. Culture and religion will have different roles in different people's lives. This may well be something that hasn't cropped up before but a wedding will encourage you to explore this!
Communicate
Communication is key! The only way you will be able to plan any wedding, but especially a multicultural wedding is with communication. Talk everything through with your partner, and then once you have reached an agreement, let your vendors and wedding planner, if you have one, know the plan. We need to know what you are thinking, we aren't psychic but we want to give you the perfect wedding.
Make your own Traditions
If you and your partner cannot decide on what traditions to have at your wedding, make your own! You can do whatever you want, it is your day. Every tradition was a new concept once, even if you are the only people to ever do it. It will still mean something to you and at the end that is all that matters.
Get a Venue that will Incorporate both Cultures/Faiths
If you are having your ceremony at a place of worship, it is important to make sure that they will allow people of a different faith to get married there and are happy to incorporate some of their customs into the ceremony. Even if the ceremony will only be about one faith or culture, some venues may not allow people in if they are not of that faith/culture. Many venues that are not religious have a 'standard wedding' package, changing this can be a problem for some venues. While this shouldn't stop you from hiring a venue you love, it is something to consider. Especially if a tradition that is important to one of you is not allowed. Such as an open flame for an Indian wedding, stamping on glass for a Jewish wedding or releasing doves for a Filipino wedding.
Fusion Food and Drink
A great way to incorporate both cultures is in the food. Not only will this make your menu taste amazing, but it will also show each other's families about your culture. You can hire a fantastic caterer that can create unique personalised menus that reflect both your cultures. You can also incorporate drinks from other cultures.
Make sure Guests Understand
If the ceremony is going to be in a language that not all the guests understand, make sure they have a way to know what is happening, such as handing out written translations. Also, some traditions may seem odd to someone of a different culture, it is important that they understand why they are happening and the meaning behind them.
Choose the right Officiant
Most religious officiants are happy to perform an interfaith ceremony, while others are not. They may not be comfortable marrying someone who is of a different religion or may not be able to incorporate other traditions into the ceremony. Some officiants are happy to perform with another officiant. For example, most Jewish and Christian officiants are happy to perform the ceremony together, whereas Catholic and Hindu officiants cannot.
Be Creative
It can be so difficult to fit everything into one conventional wedding, especially when conventional means something different to you and your partner. Sometimes the only way to get everything in is to be creative. You don't have to follow a wedding timeline or format, this day (or days!) is yours to do what you want. For example, you can have multiple ceremonies to reflect the different cultures, you can also have multiple receptions, some religions don't allow alcohol while in some cultures that's a crucial part of the wedding reception. Fashion is a big way you can get creative and show different cultures, whether that is having multiple dresses/suits to represent your different culture's, wearing your culture's traditional attire and then wearing your partner's or vice versa, or combining both cultures. Such as wearing a traditional American/Catholic dress but in red (the Chinese and Hindu wedding colour) rather than white, or wearing a white sari.
